Robin wanted the Betsy story....you can get that here.
Someone else wanted this story.
It's not that I don't like to talk about any of it....I don't mind. And I am an open book, so you can ask me anything. I don't offend easily.
But....all that's in the past. This is now. I don't really think about "Audrey" too much. In face, most of the time, the anniversary comes and goes and I don't even realize it! woohoo!
And Betts....well, she's a part of our family. Like she has always been here. whenever we are out somewhere, and someone asks how many kids do you have? It's always a thrill to say "FIVE!". But I Do make sure to celebrate our anniversary together. June 29 will be six years together. Somethin, huh?
I'm such a different person now...thank God! ;) I've grown and matured, (somewhat) and I think I handle things better today than I did way back then. all except death. I never want to get used to handling that!
and how weird is this....we've been to so many funerals lately....and I always end up talking about what I want for my own funeral. No body walking by the casket, looking at my dead body and commenting about "how good I look". I"M DEAD!!! I LOOK HORRIBLE!!! I don't want anyone falling all over the casket and screaming and crying...no drama, please. But....whenever I do think about it...I don't see myself as an old woman. I always see myself how I am now. I guess I never really thought I would "grow old" and die. I always thought I would die young.
weird.
20 comments:
I don't think the age at which you die is as important as what kind of person you were to those around you while you were alive. And you, sister-friend, have surrounded yourself with love, and it shows :)
What is age anyways?
Having said that, I don't think I want an open casket either. Just put me in an urn and display an everyday picture of me with a silly grin, speak kindly, and keep the whole event short.
Beth, I'm sitting here at the computer, with Kung-Fu Panda in the background, weeping. I've always known you are an amazing woman, I just didn't realize how amazing.
Thank-you for opening up your life like this. These are the posts that I never forget.
I told my parents I would come back and haunt them if they did an open casket for me. My aunt and uncle did that when my cousin died, and then my whole family forced me to go over to her casket and it was just horrible. It's so traumatizing to everyone else, and I didn't want to remember her that way.
I hadn't read about Audrey before. I'm so sorry. You've had a hard life, but at least you've got a lot of beautiful things to show for it!
I did not know either of those stories! Crying here! You are such an amazing woman (I already knew that, though)
In Texas we do that whole walk by the casket thing and it makes me nuts. I always file out in the opposite direction so I don't have to look! I was the only one of the four kids who refused to look at my dad in his casket. I was 4 years old, and I said, "NO way, I'm not looking!"
I want to be cremated (which I need to put into writing) because my family is not of the "cremation" mindset!
BTW, I plan my funeral all the time: Short and sweet. Get to the point and move on!
I love you, Sweetie! Thanks for linking to these stories again today. Your courage inspires me.
Wow, I just read both stories and... wow. Inspiring and... well, I feel less alone now. Thank you.
Wow, talk about getting to the heart of a person. You are a survivor and an amazing person. From another survivior who doesn't deal with her past nearly as well as you do, you are truly an inspiration to me.
I'm terribly afraid of growing old enough to lose my independence. And I don't want a funeral, either. I want a kegger ;)
You're not alone - I don't think anyone ever gets used to "handling" death.
And don't even think of dying young!
I want to be cremated and have a memorial service. I don't want to outlive my independence, either, and hope I go before then.
I have always thought the same thing. For as long as I can remember I have always thought I would be dead young ,like by 50. The Boy-Toy hates when I mention it.
Beth- This is where you listen carefully to Uncle Buff... Funerals are not for the dead, they are a time for the living to appreciate or contemplate the deceased. Respect is why you go to a wake or a viewing, or a funeral.. for the survivors, the living... We will all check out someday..pay your respects, and don't wonder why- we all go, and it must be a good place, as we never come back..
i know the audrey story but not the other one. will go back and read. just having read the audrey one i know you are one heck of a strong lady.
http://momofboxer.blogspot.com/2009/02/open-letter-dear-school-council.html
I was thinking about Audrey and Brandy the other day. I miss those two more than you can ever even begin to imagine. I'm hoping that sometime this spring or summer they can FINALLY see each other again and be the stupid and funny self they are, deep down inside, but are afraid to show it to anyone else.
...the die young thing....as a child, I always thought I would die before I turned 16. I just never thought I'd hit that age, and drive, and all that jazz.
well, clearly (and thankfully) I was wrong.
My totally weird & inappropriate comment about funerals/viewings---I told my mother: "If I die before you, and I'm laying in a casket, don't you let my boobs be in my armpits! If you have to duct tape 'em, stuff my bra, whatever! Just don't let me lay there lookin' wide & flat chested, mmmmkay????"
*******on another note, your comments about my Hubby have gone to his head.
"Well that blogger girl thinks I'm hot." is often heard around the Casa de Lainey-Paney these days.
Both of these are incredible stories even though I had already read them, they still made me cry. You are an incredible woman Beth!
You are amazing. Every time you share a story like this with us, I am floored. Seriously. Your life and stories so put my petty BS in perspective for me and I've learned to appreciate so many things in my life b/c of you and your amazing one. You are one hella woman, Beth :)
I want to be buried in a public park, face down, so my butt can be used as a bicycle rack... or just put me on the curb with a tag on my toe for the garbage man.. I'm somewhere else by then, and really don't care about where I was or what they did with me..
You are an amazing, strong lady - keep on blogging.
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