The funeral for Marty was yesterday.

I hate funerals....but I guess everyone does, huh?

What thought did I come away with?

that Millie has an AWESOME family and they will get her through this.

There are 5 children and they are ALL close.

they surrounded her with love and comfort and laughter. And they will get her through this.

They will be there for her kids.

And it made me realize, more than ever, what I don't have.

I want that.

I want her family to be mine.

I told her brother Jose last night...

"If I ever covet anything, it's your family."

I was talking to Rae tonight, and I told her that's what I want for her and her brothers and sister.

I want them to be CLOSE...to always be there for each other, no matter haw far apart they in the country.

I want the cousins to grow up together...to spend the night together....to go to Uncle Bud's house and know that they will have FUN with him. That Uncle Football will wrestle with them till they fall down from so much laughter.

That Auntie Rae will play school and do crafts and bake them cookies and Auntie Betts will teach them how to cuss. :) that Uncle Austin will give them rides on his back and on his dirtbike.....

I want them to have that closeness, so that when Marvin and I die one day...they will have the support that they"ll need from each other.

Family is everything.

too bad some people don't realize this till it's too late.

I will NOT let this happen to me.